All These Things That I've Done
by Kristen Elizabeth
Summary: Two universes are pressed together and two lovers reunite under very different circumstances. 10.5, Rose, 11, Amy Pond, oh my!
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Although I'm one of those Americans who's seen up to 5x04, there's no spoilers past episode two..so far. I expect that eventually this will become an AU, but right now it's just the start of something that popped into my head this afternoon. I hope you enjoy it!

BTW, if you're also reading my story about the Tenth Doctor and Queen Elizabeth, I haven't abandoned it. I broke my pinky five weeks ago and have only just started typing again. Updates will happen soon! Thanks for hanging on with me!

* * *

All These Things That I've Done  
by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

"I get a room?" Amy's disbelieving stare moved back and forth between the Doctor and the spacious suite he'd led her to only minutes after leaving Starship UK. "A room of my own...in your ship?"

"'Course you do. Frequent flyer's privilege." He seemed slightly puzzled by her reluctance to step inside. "Where else do you expect to wash up? Unless you fancy meeting Winston Churchill in your nightgown, smelling like Star Whale sick."

Amy narrowed her eyes at him. "I have news for you, Time Lord. You don't smell so awfully pleasant yourself."

"That's so often true." He rushed on, "You'll find a washroom attached and I'm almost positive that the wardrobe is down the hall to the left." The Doctor thought for second. "Make that the right." He pulled at his chin for another moment. "No, definitely the left."

"And...I can borrow whatever I want from it?"

"Hats, shoes, scarves, police uniforms--whatever catches your eye." He patted the wall of the TARDIS with great reverence. "For as long as you're here, she'll be your home, too. Welcome aboard, Amy Pond." With that, he sauntered off, presumably to take care of his own soiled, smelly clothes.

The sudden realization that, friendly creature or not, she'd let the Star Whale's bile dry on her skin sent Amy rushing for the promised bathroom. It was only after her very long, very hot shower that she began to explore her room.

A bed, a dressing table, a chair, a small lounge--it was basically like a nice hotel suite. Comfortable, but not personal. With towels wrapped around her body and her hair, Amy sat down at the dressing table.

"Don't suppose there'd be a brush in here," she asked herself as she began opening drawers. They weren't empty; there were hair clips and a few pieces of jewelry, a jar of beauty cream, a curling iron and a hand mirror with the initials D.N. etched in the silver. "Maybe there's one in the library with the pool."

In the last drawer, Amy found a familiar red, faux-leather bound booklet. A British passport. She opened it flat on the table.

"Rose Marion Tyler," she read aloud. Curious, she began to flip through the pages. "Who are you and where did you go?"

At one point, the passport's owner had been to France, as evidenced by the blue stamp on the first page. There were no more stamps after that, just hastily scrawled words and dates. _1869. Satellite 5. 1941. Laylora. New Earth. 1879. 1953. Krop Tor. 2012. _

There was nothing after that. Amy flipped back to the picture of a beaming bottle-blond bombshell. Suddenly, it dawned on her. "You traveled with him, didn't you?" she asked the photograph. The girl, who couldn't have been any older than she was, just kept smiling.

"So, where are you now, Rose Tyler?"

* * *

_It is far better to grasp the universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring. -- Carl Sagan_

* * *

"Rose? Did you notice this?"

Dipping her brush back into the can of paint on the table beside them, Rose blew a stray strand of hair out of her eyes. "Did I notice what?"

When she received no reply, she glanced at her Doctor. He was squinting at the wall, his nose less than an inch away from being covered in Lilac Mist. She cleared her thoat.

Immediately, he swung his attention towards her. "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine." If she'd managed to smother the yawn that snuck up on her just then, she would have gotten away with the lie. "I'm a little tired," she amended her answer. "It's to be expected."

The man who now called himself John reached for her paintbrush. "You know I can finish this on my own."

"Oh, really?" Rose challenged, holding the brush away from him. "I had to remind you to set tarps down on the floor."

"And I still say a purple floor would be brilliant."

She couldn't hide her smile any more than she'd been able to hide her yawn. "Tell me what's so terribly interesting about the wall."

But it wasn't as easy to distract him when they were on the subject of her general health. "Can you imagine what Jackie would say if she knew I was letting you do this?" He pointed a long, lilac- smudged finger at her. "She'd have my head, she would, and she'd sleep well that night."

"Well, that's just one of the many advantages to having our own flat--Mum has no say over what I do or don't do here."

"Ha!" he snorted. "Tell her that. Only let me know first, so I can be out of the country when you do."

Rose sighed as patiently as possible. "So...the wall?"

Once again her Doctor ignored her. Making a sucessful second grab for her brush, he chucked it into the can along with his own. "Why don't we finish this later? It's almost time for dinner."

"John..."

"What'll it be tonight?" He rubbed his hands together. "Beans on toast? Bangers and mash? Fish with custard?"

Rose scowled. "I've never had a craving for that."

"No, but it doesn't sound half bad, does it?"

"Doctor!" He stopped, defeated by the exasperation in her tone. Rose put her hand on the swell of her stomach; their baby kicked just then, as if he or she could feel its mother's touch. "What's with the bloody wall?'

He took his time replying, as if choosing his words with great care because the wrong combination might worry or upset her.

"Well...as far as walls go, it's fairly sturdy..."

"But?" she pressed.

"But..." Reaching out, her half-human Doctor dragged his finger through the wet paint, tracing a jagged line over the spot where their child's crib would soon sit. "There's a crack in it."

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To Be Continued


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Thank you so much to everyone who read and/or reviewed the first chapter. I'm really glad you came back for more!! I hope you enjoy it!!

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All These Things That I've Done

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

"Who was Rose Tyler?"

It was the first time his new ears had heard the name and, as the Doctor had feared, it had just as much impact on this body as it had on the previous two.

He refused to look away from the console, dead set against Amy seeing any emotion that might be displayed on his face. She had an uncanny knack for seeing straight through him already.

On the other hand, if he ignored the question altogether that would only give her interrogation more fuel.

"She traveled with me awhile back," he replied as he twisted a random knob that he'd never noticed before. "Did you find something of hers in the wardrobe?"

"In my room. Which I suppose used to be hers." Amy started down the steps towards him. When she reached his level, she held out a red booklet that he remembered all too well. "She forgot to take her passport when she left."

The Doctor quickly moved around to the other side of the console on the pretense of needing to press another button. "Yes, well. That happens sometimes."

"And that answers another question." Amy set the passport down and folded her arms. "You do this a lot, then. Picking up passengers?"

"I'm not a double-decker," he glowered, "but I do like a bit of company from time to time, yes."

"How long ago was Rose here?"

The Doctor lifted one shoulder. "A few of your years. Hard to say." He suddenly smacked the console. "How would you like to see the first anti-gravity Olympics?"

Amy arched an eyebrow. "One more question answered. She meant a lot to you."

"I try not to travel with anyone who doesn't matter to me."

"Yeah, but there's friends and then there's..." She rocked forward on the balls of her feet. "..._friends_. I'm guessing she was the latter." A moment passed. "She was pretty. Why did she leave you?"

He wanted to lie. He'd done it before with Martha. Told her a tale of the Time Lords who no longer existed. It had been so easy. It would be here, too. He could say that Rose went home to be with her mother, her boyfriend--that she'd tired of the adventure and wanted a normal life. It was true of other companions he'd had.

But not Rose. Somehow, the idea of outright lying about Rose felt like a punch to the stomach. She deserved better.

So, he told Amy what he'd told Donna. "She didn't. I lost her."

Several seconds passed in utter silence. "I'm sorry," Amy eventually murmured, lowering her chin until it touched her chest. "I didn't realize she was..." She stopped short. "So!" Lifting her head, she tried for a bright smile. "Anti-gravity Olympics, you said?"

It didn't occur to the Doctor until later that she might have misunderstood his answer, but even if it had, he wasn't sure he would have set the record straight.

For all intents and purposes, Rose Tyler was well and truly gone forever.

* * *

_Some say that the universe is made so that when we are about to understand it, it changes into something even more incomprehensible. And then there are those who say...that has already happened. -- Douglas Adams_

* * *

He couldn't sleep and it had nothing to do with the fact that Rose had gotten up to use the toilet no less than four times since they'd gone to bed.

"Sorry," she told him as she climbed back under the covers, not an easy feat given the size of her belly. "I tried not to wake you."

"Don't worry about that." When Rose was settled on her side again, John shifted behind her and rested his chin on her shoulder, his arm draped across her thickened waist. "He's kicking?"

"She is," Rose corrected him. "No one is sleeping tonight."

"You should. You need your rest."

"Doctor's orders?" she teased. He snorted softly into her hair. "Everything's fine." She moved his hand from her stomach to her hip. "You don't need to worry about me so much."

He frowned. "Am I bothering you?"

"No. No! It's just..." She hesitated. "You're starting to sound like my mum."

Slowly, John withdrew his arm and rolled onto his back, away from the warmth of her body. "I didn't realize."

With great effort, Rose turned onto her other side to face him. "And I didn't mean that." She pressed a kiss onto the short sleeve of his shirt. "I'm sorry."

"This is all new to me, Rose. Yes, I've been a father before," he continued before she could say anything. "But not like this. And not with you." He glanced at her. "You're the most important thing in the world to me and you're carrying our child. Don't ask me not to worry."

They watched each others eyes for a long moment. "That crack in the wall...it bothers you, doesn't it?"

John sniffed suddenly and turned his face up towards the ceiling. "It's just a crack."

"No, it isn't." Rose laid her cheek on his arm. "Why are you lying to me?"

"Because it doesn't bother me." He paused. "It scares me."

She swallowed heavily. "What is it?"

"I don't know." Anger crept into his tone, making each word harsher. "And I won't know. I can't know. There's no way to know! No sonic screwdriver, no TARDIS database...and I don't think the toys at Torchwood are going to tell me a ruddy thing!" His chest rose and fell beneath Rose's head. "He marooned us here, Rose. And this world is just as dangerous as his."

"He did what he thought was best," she whispered. "For both of us."

"'Course he did. Better to believe that, isn't it?" When he felt the warm wetness of her tears seep through his shirt a second later, he silently cursed himself. "Rose, forgive me." He wrapped his arms around her, holding her as tightly as he could without hurting their baby. "Please forgive me."

"Can we just go to sleep?" she asked, her voice muffled by his chest. "I really need to sleep."

He drew back only far enough to give her a soft kiss. He could taste the salt of her tears on her lips; his Adam's apple bobbed madly. "I love you so much."

_So much more than he did._

Her eyes were already closed. Her breath evened out a minute later as she slipped into her dreams. He held her until dawn when his own eyes shut...and his nightmares began.

* * *

To Be Continued


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Thank you so much to the people who have taken the time to read and review! I hope you enjoy this chapter, too!! There are some spoilers for "Victory of the Daleks," though, so tread lightly if you're getting your Who-fix from BBC America!

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All These Things That I've Done

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

"There you are!" The Doctor's voice bounced off the watery walls, startling Amy out of her thoughts. "And you've found the pool--clever girl!"

Looking down at the spot where her painted toes dipped below the pool's silent surface, she sighed. "Aren't I just?"

"Not exactly where I left it, though," the Doctor went on, pulling off his own shoes and socks. He plopped down beside her and plunged his feet into the water. "I rather liked it in the library." When she said nothing, he glanced over at her. "Amy Pond, are you hiding from me?"

"What? No!" She drew her knees up and tucked them under her chin. "I was just...thinking."

The Doctor nodded. "Yes. Thinking. My favorite past-time." He paused. "What about?"

Amy sighed again, softer this time. "Don't know. Nothing important." She curled her toes around the lip of the pool. "I just met Winston Churchill."

"Brilliant, isn't he? Except for that rubbish cigar habit."

"And...I met the Daleks."

The Doctor's grin instantly fell. "Yeah. That you did."

"What you said...that I should've already known what they were..." She hesitated. "I don't understand what you meant."

"Still trying to figure it out myself," he confessed. "You're a puzzle, Amy Pond."

Her forehead wrinkled. "Is there something wrong with me?"

"Eh, it might not be you." The Doctor leaned forward, resting his elbows on the rolled-up cuffs of his pants at his knees. "Maybe it's everything else."

"But it could be me?" He lifted his shoulders. "Can't you give me a straight answer for once?" Amy demanded.

The Doctor smiled mysteriously. "There is no such thing. Stick with me long enough and you'll learn that."

Frustrated, she turned away from him. For a long time, there was nothing but the sound of the water as he moved his feet through it.

"We could have died today," Amy finally said, breaking the silence.

"We could die any day," he reminded her. "Today we were just a little closer, is all."

"I never imagined that was even possible. All those years...waiting for you...it never once occurred to me that traveling with you might be dangerous."

The Doctor spoke softly. "Do you want me to take you home?"

"Did Rose ever ask to go home?"

It took him a long time to reply. "She wanted to stay." He kicked the water. "She would have stayed."

_Forever._

"Well, so will I." The Doctor glanced at her. "You still owe me a visit to an alien planet." She poked his side with her manicured fingernail. "You're not so easily rid of me, Time Lord."

He grinned. "I've got just the place we can go." He jumped up and offered her his hand. "Are you in?"

She let him help her stand, giving him the sweetest of smiles. "No, that would be you." It only took the slightest push to knock him off his feet. He hit the water with a terrific splash. "The pool, I mean!" she called after him.

When he shot to the surface a second later, he was laughing wildly, his hair plastered to his forehead. "Oh, I like you, Amy Pond!" he declared, wiping water from his face.

Amy gave him a curtsey and a wink before leaving the room.

The Doctor stood in the waist-deep water for a long time after she left...thinking.

* * *

_There are no extra pieces in the universe. Everyone is here because he or she has a place to fill, and every piece must fit itself into the jigsaw puzzle. -- Deepak Chopra_

* * *

"Let me get this straight, John. You want my permission to take home a piece of Torchwood equipment that is so valuable we haven't even set a price on it...so you can examine a crack in your wall?"

"Ah..." The man Pete Tyler had first known as the Doctor scratched his fingers through his spiky bangs. "Yeah. Yeah, that's about right." Pete stood up slowly. "If it makes a difference," John rushed on, "the crack is on the nursery wall."

Hands in his pockets, Pete came around to the front of his desk. "Listen, old chap. I get it. Believe me, I do."

"You do?"

"It wasn't so long ago that I was an expectant father, myself. First time parent. Everything's new; everything seems like a potential threat." He clapped a hand onto John's shoulder. "You know I've come to consider Rose my own daughter, so trust me when I say that I'm glad to see you looking after her safety, but..."

John cut him off. "You don't understand. This isn't just a crack. It's something much worse."

"Well, it can't be structural damage. I had a whole bloody team of inspectors go over every inch of that house before you two moved in."

"I don't think there's anything wrong with the wall." John paused to let that sink in. "Have you ever known me to be wrong, Pete?"

Pete folded his arms. "You haven't put a ring on my daughter's hand yet and she's due to have your baby any day. I wouldn't call that right."

"It's...that's...complicated. And beside the point!" John shot to his feet, taking advantage of the extra inches of height he had over Rose's father. "Are you going to let me borrow the magnifier or not?"

Before Pete could reply, there was a knock on the door. It opened a second later and Rose poked her head inside. "Am I interrupting?"

John reached her first. Taking her hands in his, he leaned down for a kiss. "Never. But what are you doing here?" he asked as he not-so-subtly guided her to the chair he'd just vacated. "I thought Jackie had you this afternoon."

"I escaped," Rose said triumphantly. "Thought I'd come here and see if I could do something more useful with my day than researching baby names."

"That's why you're Torchwood's finest, love." Pete kissed her cheek before retreating behind his desk. "But maternity leave means that you shouldn't even be in this building at all."

Standing just behind her, John touched her shoulder. "I'll take you home, Rose."

"You'll do no such thing until one of you tells me why you're both in a strop." After a minute of silence, she craned her neck to see her Doctor, then looked back at her father. "Well, don't all rush at once, boys."

"Minor disagreement," Pete said. "Nothing you should worry over."

"Don't I get to decide that? Or did I surrender my brain when I got pregnant?"

John crouched down next to her chair. "Maybe it can wait for another day."

"Not if it has anything to do with the crack in our nursery wall, it can't!" With a protective hand on her swollen stomach, Rose leveled her father with a look. "Whatever he wants, I'd really like it if you gave it to him."

"Rose, you shouldn't get yourself all worked up about..."

"I can hear voices!" Rose cut her father off. A moment passed. "In the crack...someone's talking." John took her free hand, only to find it cold and clammy. "Now, I may still be learning about your world, but I'm almost positive that hearing voices coming from the walls is mad in any universe."

"What were the voices saying?" John asked. "Could you understand them?"

Rose shook her head. "Not really. It was like...whispers." She threaded her fingers through her Doctor's. "Honestly, I didn't want to know. Sort of still don't."

"Voices?" Pete asked his daughter. "You're certain?"

"I've already started moving the baby's things into another room," she told him.

"Pete." The man blinked and focused on the half-Time Lord. "The magnifier?" John asked again.

His throat closed up, but he nodded. "You'll have it by sundown."

* * *

To Be Continued


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: If you haven't seen "Time of the Angels" and "Flesh and Stone" yet, this may be a bit confusing. But from here on out, I'll pretty much be in AU land. Sorry, I tried to keep it in cannon for as long as I could. I hope you still enjoy it! Thanks for reading and reviewing; your feedback keeps me going!

* * *

All These Things That I've Done

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

"So...just exactly when was the last time you..." Amy stopped short of making a very rude gesture. "...you know?"

"There really isn't time for any of that!" Having just pushed his randy companion into the TARDIS, the Doctor went straight to the console and began pressing buttons and pulling levers. "Do you understand what's happening?"

"Not really." She folded her arms over her chest. "First time I've been turned down flat by any bloke."

His head shot up to give her a very disapproving look. "Humans. Always got one thing on your minds. No wonder you survive for as long as you do." With their coordinates fixed, the TARDIS lurched into action, forcing them both to grab onto something in order to stay standing.

Amy chose the Doctor.

"Now, Amy..."

"You don't snog like a man who hasn't been with a woman in 900 years." She tugged at his bow tie. "In fact, you're fairly decent at it."

"I'm not...it hasn't been that long," he confessed. "It's actually been happening more and more recently." He looked back and forth between her eyes. "You Earth girls are getting to be too much for me."

The corners of her lips curled up. "So, I'm not the first then?"

"First in this body," the Doctor mumbled.

"What does that mean?"

It took some effort, but the Doctor managed to peel Amy off of him. "We're here." After snapping his braces back in place after his companion's final attempt to undress him, he ran for the door.

With a sigh, Amy followed him out of the TARDIS. "But...wait..." Frowning, she looked around the familiar surroundings. "This is the museum. Again."

"The Delirium Archive," the Doctor corrected her.

She threw her head back with a groan. "You know, you still owe me an alien planet. I don't count the last one seeing as how I nearly died there!"

"Ha!" The Doctor turned around in circles, ignoring all the display cases in favor of searching the walls. "If you think I'm taking you to a different planet before I figure you out..." He trailed off as something caught his eye. "...think again." With that, he started running towards the farthest wall.

"Doctor?" Amy watched him climb onto a desk that was probably older than he was. "What are you doing?"

"Don't you see?" With the side of his face pressed against it, he ran his hand over a section of the wall. "It's cracked. The wall has a crack. We came here...and it cracked."

She took a step back. "Did I do that?"

"Not on purpose." He paused. "At least, not consciously." Whipping out his sonic screwdriver, he buzzed the length of the crack.

"Well, don't open it!" Amy shouted. "We'll get sucked in like the Angels!"

"I don't think so," the Doctor murmured, studying the screwdriver.

"Then you'll let something in like Prisoner Zero!" Amy put her hands on her hips. "Bad things happen when you mess with the crack; have you learned nothing?"

"Shh!" The Doctor put his ear directly against the crack. "I can hear voices," he whispered.

Amy swallowed. "Voices?"

_Who's there? We can hear you!_

_Tell us who you are!_

"I know that voice." The Doctor moved back, staring at the wall in disbelief. "Those voices...they're..."

He never got to finish his sentence. A light suddenly appeared along the crack, growing stronger until, in a blinding flash, the Doctor disappeared.

* * *

_Really, the fundamental, ultimate mystery--the only thing you need to know to understand the deepest metaphysical secrets--is this: that for every outside there is an inside and for every inside there is an outside, and although they are different, they go together. -- Alan Watts_

* * *

It took two grown men fifteen minutes to get the magnifier into the half-painted, former nursery.

When they finally set it down on the hardwood floor, the half-human Doctor wiped his forehead with his sleeve and grumbled, "I can't wait for you lot to develop sonic technology."

Even out of breath, Pete managed to glare at him. "You could always help us along there."

"Don't think I wouldn't if I could, but there's just no way of telling how much trouble you'd get into with it."

Rose stood in the doorway, rubbing gentle circles over her stomach. "Stop it, you two. She's kicking enough without you upsetting her."

"Sorry, love," John apologized as he donned his glasses. She smiled, unable to stay annoyed with him when he wore his brainy specs.

"What are you expecting to find with this thing?" Pete asked.

Dropping to his knees, John flipped a few switches on the heavy machine that Torchwood had recovered from the crash of a Tartarian leisure cruiser only two months after he'd joined the organization. "If the crack isn't in the wall," he began, "then it must be in the very fabric of the universe."

"What...like, take the wall away and the crack would still be there?"

John grinned at Rose. "Nothing ever gets by you." They locked eyes for a moment until Pete cleared his throat. "Right! So, the universe is cracked, which apart from being scary and wrong and about a hundred other bad things, begs the question..." John paused. "What's on the other side?"

"And this thing is going to tell you?"

"Oh, have a little faith, Pete!" He flipped a final switch and jumped to his feet. "I'd move back if I were you."

Pete backed up to the opposite wall while John joined Rose at the doorway, standing as a shield between her and the scanning beam that shot out from the machine, even though it was directed on the crack.

"What's it doing?" she asked him.

"Taking a reading. Downloading the results."

"Like the screwdriver?"

John sniffed indignantly. "I suppose it's the closest thing to it, but it's nowhere near as advanced."

Rose slipped her arm through his. "Of course not." She rested her cheek on his shoulder blade. "I miss it, too."

"Is that all you..." He stopped short as the crack began to glow. "Oh...that's beautiful!" He took a step forward. "Wrong...very, very wrong, but gorgeous none the less."

Upon reaching the machine, John crouched down to examine the digital screen. The readings were in Tartarian, a language with which he was only vaguely familiar. Squinting, he started to translate in his head, lamenting the loss of the TARDIS translation circuit more than ever.

"Doctor!" He whipped his head back at Rose's frantic cry. "I can hear voices again!"

John looked back at the crack. It was still glowing, as if lit from behind. Closing his eyes, he could just make out a few words.

_I don't...so._

_Then....something in...zero! Bad things...you mess with...you learned nothing?_

"Who's there?" John demanded. "We can hear you!"

"Tell us who you are!" Rose chimed in.

Silence followed. John moved forward, walking towards the wall.

Pete pulled at his chin. "Don't know if it's such a good idea, you getting that close."

"Yeah," Rose agreed, shifting nervously from one foot to the other. The baby was kicking even harder now, as if agreeing that its father should stop. "Please come back."

Half of her Doctor's face was illuminated as he studied the crack. "Just need one moment to..."

Without warning, the light coming from the fractured wall tripled until it was too much to bear. Rose and Pete both turned their heads away from it.

When the light died a few seconds later, Rose's eyes flew open. In the spot where her Doctor had just stood, there was a strange man in a bow tie and red braces. Their eyes met and a shiver ran down her spine.

"Rose?" he asked, breaking the silence.

"Where did John go?" Pete stepped forward, pointing an accusing finger at the new arrival. "Where the bloody hell did you come from?"

The man just kept staring at Rose, as if he never intended to look away. "Language, Pete," he scolded. "What would Jackie say?"

Rose's hand drifted to her belly; the baby was still now. "Who are you?"

"You already know, Rose Tyler." And when he smiled, suddenly she did.

Just before she fainted, she whispered, "Doctor?"

* * *

To Be Continued


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Thank you so much for all of the kind reviews. I hope you enjoy this chapter, too!

I had a really nice review from a reader in Poland that I've managed to (mostly) translate. Will the next part be happy? Guess we'll have to see;)

* * *

All These Things That I've Done

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

It happened so quickly. One second he was in the home he shared with Rose, and in the next he was standing on a desk...

...with a very irate red-head screaming at him.

Not all that unfamiliar.

"Who the hell are you?" the girl demanded. "And where the hell did you come from?"

Ignoring her, John quickly scanned the width of the cavernous room, taking in the glass cases and artifacts. "Is this the Delirium Archive?"

"Congratulations, you know where you are," she snapped. "Now, what did you do with the Doctor?"

With that one word, the girl had his complete attention. "The Doctor?" He jumped down from the desk, landing in front of her. "Where is he?"

She took a step away from him. "Don't play stupid! He was right there, where you are, and now he's gone and you're here, so I'm going to ask you one more time...what have you done with the Doctor?!"

John raked his fingers through his hair. "Oh...this is bad. This is very, very bad."

The girl let out a quiet snort. "At least we can agree on that."

Just over her shoulder, John suddenly noticed the achingly familiar outline of a bright blue police box. He swallowed, his Adam's apple bobbing just above the collar of his shirt. Instinct compelled him to run towards it.

"Stop right there!" the girl commanded, hot on his heels. He reached the TARDIS only to find it solidly locked. "Good luck getting inside!" she taunted. "Only the Doctor has the key and..."

Closing his eyes and praying it would still work, despite the Human half of his DNA, John snapped his fingers. Before he even looked, he knew the door had opened. He could smell that wonderful scent of what had once been his only home, metallic and earthy at the same time, and could hear the vessel's creak and groan welcoming him back.

John opened his eyes, looked into the TARDIS and immediately frowned. "What's happened to it?"

The girl followed him inside. "How did you do that? Who are you?"

"Blimey..." After taking a moment to look around, John bounded up the steps to the console. "He didn't just redecorate; he redesigned!"

"You know the Doctor, then?" The girl watched him closely. "You've traveled with him, too?"

"Oh...you could say that." He ran his hands over the controls, seeking out the familiar amongst the new. His head snapped up. "Wait, you're his companion?" The girl nodded, as if he was an idiot who'd finally caught on. "But where's Donna?" When she just gave him a blank look, John advanced on her. "Donna? Donna Noble? Ginger hair, big mouth, half-Time Lord?" He grabbed her shoulders. "Is she all right?"

"I don't know!" the girl shouted, throwing off his hands. "I don't know who she is! It's just me here; no one else!"

John stepped back, running his hand down his mouth. "What's your name?"

"Tell me yours first." After a moment of silence, she gave in with a terse, "Amy. Pond."

"How long have you known the Doctor, Amy?"

She shook her head. "No. I'm not answering any more of your questions until you start answering some of mine." Her eyes narrowed. "Where is the Doctor?"

A moment passed as they warily watched each other. "I can already see why he picked you, Amy Pond." Sniffing loudly, John whipped off his glasses. "That's a brilliant name, by the way."

Amy blinked. "So I've been told."

"You've got cheek, Amy, lots of it, and although we've just met, I have a feeling there's more that's brilliant about you than just your name." John paused. "Yet...you don't recognize me at all, do you?"

"Should I?"

"He's regenerated." The simple statement echoed off the TARDIS walls, lingering in the air between them. Shutting his eyes, he sighed. "Must have been a rough one."

Arms tightly folded, Amy leaned forward. "Who are you?"

John's eyes flew open as he began to put the pieces together. "Hold on! If I'm here...then maybe he's there!" His jaw clenched ever so slightly. "With her."

"Where's that, then?" Amy was two seconds away from stomping her foot. "Who are you? Tell me!"

"Humans!" Blinking out of his momentary reverie, he threw up his hands. "Two universes get tangled up in one great, big cosmic disaster, and all you care about is names!"

"You must have travelled with him; you sound just like him." Amy pressed on sharply, "I'm very Human and proud of it, so why don't you just tell me your name?"

It was her turn to glare at him until he finally gave in. "John. John Smythe."

"Now was that so hard?"

John smiled without mirth. "Tell me this, Amy Pond. What was the Doctor doing right before he disappeared?"

* * *

_In answer to the question of why it happened, I offer the modest proposal that our universe is simply one of those things which happen from time to time. -- Edward P. Tryon_

* * *

Although he'd been farther away from Rose, the Doctor was the one to catch her before she fell. As soon as he had her in his arms, he sank to the floor, cradling her as gently as possible.

Rose. Beautiful, brilliant Rose. Darker roots in her hair, but still the same delicious freesia scent. In fact, there was only one real change in her since the last time he'd seen her kissing his clone on the beach in Norway.

One large change that he could feel kicking against his arm.

"Rose?" As her lashes fluttered, the Doctor tucked a loose lock of blonde hair behind her ear. "Come on, Rose. All the way awake."

Pete stood over them, agitated and confused in equal amounts. "You can't be the Doctor. It's impossible."

"You know me, Pete. I like impossible." Rose's eyes opened and the Doctor smiled. "There she is, now. Sorry about the shock," he apologized, lowering his voice for her ears only. "Always seem to do that to you, don't I?"

Her forehead wrinkled as she tried to lift her head to look around. "Doctor?"

"That's me; I'm here." The Doctor pointed at his face. "New new new Doctor, remember?"

Rose started to sit up. "What's happened? Pete?"

"I don't know, love." Her father took her hand and helped her to her feet. "He keeps saying he's the Doctor, but he can't be."

She pressed her hand to her belly. "Yes, he can. He is...I think." Looking down at the man in question, she struggled to keep her voice from wobbling. "You regenerated?"

Nodding, the Doctor stood up. "Yeah. I did."

Hot tears welled up in her eyes. "How?"

"Radiation poisoning," he replied, straight-faced. "It was for another good cause."

Her lip trembled. "Where's John?"

"John?" The Doctor frowned, then realized. "Oh. Him." He lifted his shoulders. "I'm guessing he's probably where I was, but that's only a wild guess. Could be wrong. Are you two...?"

"No." Rose blinked back her tears before they could fall and gestured to her stomach. "I did this on my own."

"Really?"

She glared at him. "This form's a bit thick." Her gaze slipped down. "Where's your coat? I loved that coat."

"Can we talk about coats and such later?" Pete interrupted. "I, for one, would like to know exactly how John disappeared, where he's gone, and how we ended up with a Doctor who doesn't look anything like the Doctor!"

"I was dying; I changed my face; life goes on! Now, then..." The Doctor turned towards the wall at the far end of the room. "Purple?" he asked, indicating the paint that covered only half of it.

"Lilac," she corrected him. "Why does it matter?"

"Why did you stop painting?" The Doctor glanced back at Rose; her face was pale. "Maybe something you found on the wall frightened you? Like, say, a crack?" The fear in her eyes was all the answer he needed. "I was afraid of this."

"Afraid of what?" Pete asked.

"The crack. The big, scary crack the wall." The Doctor nodded. "Yes, I see it now."

Rose took a shaky breath. "John was trying to figure out what it was when he..." She steeled herself for whatever his answer might be. "Do you know what it is?"

"Nothing much. Just a rip in the fabric of time and space."

"Oh, only that?"

The Doctor flashed her a grin, but it was nothing like the smile she was used to. "Cheeky Rose Tyler never changes." His eyes dropped to her protruding stomach; he quickly refocused on the wall. "Our universes are pressed together; they always have been. That's why they're so much alike." He tapped his temple in deep thought. "I was on one side; he was on the other. And now we've switched."

"Can you switch back?" Rose asked softly.

A second passed. "Do you want us to?"

All it took was one look at the distress that overwhelmed his daughter's face for Pete to jump into action. "All right, enough of this! Rose, I'm taking you to the hospital."

"What?" She shook her head. "I'm fine, Dad. We both are."

"You passed out, sweetheart. It's just to be on the safe side. Your mother will kill me if she finds out I didn't make you get checked over." Pete hesitated. "So will John."

"Go with him, Rose," the Doctor said. "Take care of yourself."

Rose watched him run his hands over the wall. "All right," she agreed. "But you're coming with us."

He turned around, genuinely puzzled. "What?"

Walking to him, Rose grabbed one of his red suspenders. "I'm not losing you both. Understood?"

The Doctor lowered his chin in reluctant acknowledgement. "Yeah. 'Course." Glancing back up, their eyes locked again. "I have missed you, Rose Tyler."

She released him and the brace snapped against his chest with enough force to make him wince. "And stop using my full name." She started for the door. "It's weird now."

He flicked her a salute that seemed eerily out of place.

* * *

To Be Continued


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Thank you so much for the incredibly kind feedback! I hope you enjoy this chapter, too!!

* * *

All These Things That I've Done

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

"So...it's here, too." Having climbed back onto the desk, the tall stranger had one eye shut as he examined the crack in the wall. "Isn't that wizard?"

Down below, perched on a display case, Amy watched the man called John. He was good-looking, damn good-looking--no sense in denying that, especially when she was still hot under the collar--but there was something odd about him that she just couldn't put her finger on.

Like how he'd gotten into the TARDIS and his reaction once inside. And how he referred to the Doctor. There was very little reverence there, unlike River Song or Liz 10 who had both treated the Doctor like a cross between Jesus and one of the Beatles.

Still, she couldn't deny that the initial shock of the Doctor's disappearance and the fear-driven anger that had followed had almost completely faded. She wasn't the kind of girl who trusted anything or anyone blindly. So why did she feel safe with this man? It probably wasn't his fantastic hair, but it certainly made Amy very curious.

"Are you ever going to tell me how you know the Doctor?" she asked, swinging her legs. "I mean, you travelled with him, obviously, but how long ago? Where did he take you? Why did you leave?"

"That's an awful lot of questions." John frowned at the wall. "I don't suppose he left his screwdriver in his coat, did he?"

"Oh, he lost his coat," Amy said. "The Angels got it."

That got John's attention. "The Angels? The Weeping Angels?"

"Yeah. You must have been with him the last time, then." Eager for information, she leaned forward. "He said he met them a long time ago on Earth."

"The Angels have the coat?" His shoulders sagged a bit. "Janis Joplin's coat?"

Amy frowned. "Must be a different coat. He nicked this one from a hospital locker room."

Somehow, this seemed to cheer John. "Well." He jerked his shoulder. "Old habits die hard."

"Look, if you're not going to tell me anything else, can you at least tell me where he's gone?"

"I did tell you."

She folded her arms over her red sweatshirt. "You said he was 'there.' Where's 'there'?"

"It's complicated." John scratched the back of his head. "Parallel universe."

"That doesn't sound good."

"It's not," he assured her. "If the walls of the universe are cracked, there will be plenty of very bad things trying to take advantage of it. Every world will be in danger. Again." His tone grew dark. "And I have even more to protect this time. I've got to get back to her."

"All right, who is she? Your wife?"

John stepped down from the desk. "Not yet."

She followed him back into the TARDIS. "Can I ask you one more thing?"

"I have a feeling you will." Sliding his glasses back on, he grabbed the monitor screen and swung it into place. "Leather-covered? Really?" he grumbled. "Never needed leather before..."

"What makes you think that anything we can do will get him back here and you back there?" She spread her arms. "I've only just figured out where the toilet is in this place. Oh, and the blue stabilizers. I can stabilize things."

John frowned. "What do you mean, blue stabilizers?" Amy pointed at the blue buttons that River Song had used to make a silent landing. "Those don't do anything," John argued. "They're just blue."

"Okay, you have got to stop doing that. Sounding just like him--it's creepy. How much time did you spend with him?"

He ignored this. "Amy, did the Doctor have any idea what was causing the cracks?"

"No. But..." She stopped.

"But what?"

Amy hesitated. "Maybe...he thought that maybe...it might be me."

"You?" Coming around to her side, John whipped off his glasses. "Why you?"

"The cracks are sort of...following me."

He stared at her. "And you're only just mentioning that now?!"

"It only just came up," she snapped.

John slowly shook his head. "You are so much like Donna. Has he ever told you that?"

"He's never mentioned her. Just someone called Rose."

"Rose." He swallowed heavily. "Yeah." Turning his attention back to the monitor, he glowered. "That sounds like him."

Amy pounced on this. "Did you know her? I found her passport in my room. I asked him about her, but he wouldn't say much. Just that he'd lost her."

John let out a bitter chuckle. "Lost? Is that how he's remembering it?"

"What happened to her?"

For a second, it seemed like John wanted to say something more, but he stopped himself. "The cracks can't be following you exclusively. You've never been to my world. It's got to be something bigger than you." Just then, a moving shape caught his eye on the monitor.

"Maybe if we sit here long enough, the Doctor will figure it out on his side. He is sort of brilliant like that."

"You think so? Well, Amy Pond...you haven't seen anything yet!" With that, John pulled a lever pumped a handle. The whoosing sound of the TARDIS was followed by a sudden jerk as they took off.

"What are you doing?" Amy cried. "We can't just leave!"

"It was either leave or become part of the Archive." John pointed at the screen where a few seconds earlier he'd seen armed guards heading straight for them. "We were spotted by security." With his trainer, he kicked another lever into place.

"You can fly the TARDIS, too?"

He grinned, like a child who'd been reunited with his favorite toy. "Just like riding a bicycle!"

"Where are we going?" she demanded to know.

"Wherever you first saw one of the cracks."

Amy hesitated before answering, "My bedroom."

"Then that's where we're going. Your bedroom."

She snorted softly. "Now you don't sound so much like him."

* * *

_The universe is wider than our views of it. -- Henry David Thoreau_

* * *

"All right, Rose. You're actually a little over a centimeter dilated, which is completely normal at thirty-five weeks." The OB assistant smiled warmly as she peeled off her gloves. "Everything looks just fine otherwise, but I am going to order a sonogram, just to be certain."

"I really only passed out for a second," Rose reminded her. "And I just had one two weeks ago."

But the woman was already writing the order. "Yes, but it can't hurt to have another look. As I understand from your primary physican, you haven't been able to tell what the baby's sex is yet."

"No. She's been shy every time."

_Maybe it is a girl after all, Rose. She keeps her legs properly closed. _

"You want a girl, then?"

Rose stared at the ceiling. "I want a healthy, normal baby."

"Well, as far as I can tell, there should be no worries there." She patted Rose's arm. "Stay here and rest. I'll be back soon." At the door, the woman looked back. "Would you like me to send someone back here to be with you? The baby's father?"

Her throat closed up suddenly. John had been with her every step of the way thus far; from the moment the test stick turned pink, he'd never missed a single doctor's visit. He'd asked a million questions, done a ton of research and driven her to the point of insanity by baby-proofing the entire house by the time she was three months gone and throwing away everything they owned that was alcoholic, caffeinated or flammable.

Now he was gone and Rose had only felt this lonely one other time in her life.

"He's not..." She steeled herself. "He's not here."

When the physician's assistant was gone, Rose let out a shaky breath. It was the first time she'd been left with her thoughts since the Doctor's sudden appearance in her world...and what a jumbled mess they were!

The "how" had already been answered. Maybe there would always be a crack or a Dalek invasion or a rip in time that would bring the Doctor back to her. But as for why it kept happening--the only answer she could come up with was that life was just cruel.

Or maybe it was just him. Because how could be so certain that they'd never meet again--so certain, in fact, that he'd left her with a cloned consolation prize--when he knew the infinite possibilities of the universe better than anyone else?

John as a consolation prize. Why did that make her stomach ache with guilt? Hadn't he said as much himself on their first night together?

_I know I'm not him, Rose, no matter what I look like. I'll never be him. But if you want, I will spend the rest of my life with you, and every day, I'll tell you what he never could. Never would. And if you're never able to say it back without thinking about him, it's all right. I know you didn't ask for any of this. But I think, deep down, maybe he and I did. _

A knock on the door startled her out of the memory of his piercing brown eyes. Without thinking, Rose called out, "Come in."

She wasn't sure how to describe the man who appeared in the doorway. He looked young, so much younger than her Doctor, and while he wasn't unattractive, his face seemed...alien. Rose was all-too familiar with the properties of regeneration, but she was having a hard time imagining under what circumstances the Doctor had gone from tall and gorgeous to tall and gangly.

"Sorry!" the Doctor apologized as she scrambled to make certain she was entirely covered by her hospital gown and blanket. "You said it was all right to come in."

"I thought you were the doctor!" she scowled.

"Well..."

"Oh, just shut the door, would you? What are you doing here?"

"I was looking for a shop," he confessed. "I still like a little shop." The Doctor looked around the room. "Not here, I see."

Rose rubbed her suddenly aching temple. "Are you sure everything went all right with this regeneration?"

"Why?" He pulled at his hair, then touches his nose, chin and ears. "Everything's in the proper spots, yes?"

"You're just...different."

With his hands clasped behind his back, the Doctor rocked forward, as if nodding with his entire body. "And you, Dame Rose...you're remarkably calm about all of this."

"What did you expect, Doctor?" Rose looked down at her trembling hands. "Suppose I've seen too much to be surprised or get upset about things anymore."

"Yeah," he agreed. A long moment of awkward silence passed before he spoke again. "I never thought I'd see you again."

"I see you every day," she whispered. Fighting back tears, she drew in a calming breath. "Are you still traveling with Donna? Bet she's ready to kill you by now for disappearing on her."

"Donna's gone." The short, impersonal way he delivered the news made Rose blink. "She's fine--married and happy. Martha, too, and Mickey. Everyone's fine."

It was a good answer, yet somehow she felt a twinge of pain in her chest. "You're on your own, then?"

The Doctor didn't get to answer; just then, the door opened and the sonogram technician wheeled in her machine.

"Will you be staying?" the tech asked the Doctor.

He looked to Rose. "Will I be staying?"

She didn't want to be alone and so she found herself nodding.

It took a few minutes of preparation and some very cold gel applied to her rounded stomach, but soon an image appeared on the screen. The perfect curve of her baby's forehead and tiny nose.

"Rose..." The Doctor sank onto the chair beside the exam table. She tore her eyes away from her baby to see him staring at the image without blinking. "That's...brilliant."

A tear slipped down her cheek. "That's what he said."

"Would you like to know the baby's sex?" the tech asked.

"You can tell?" Rose asked, sniffing. "She's not playing shy?"

"No." The woman smiled. "He's not. It's a little boy." Looking at Rose, the woman was surprised to see her tears falling freely. "Are you all right, love?"

"John said so, all along." She refused to look at the Doctor, afraid of what she might or might not see in his eyes. "He should be here...to see his son."

Rose wasn't at all surprised when the Doctor quietly slipped out of the room a few minutes later.

* * *

To Be Continued


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Yes, the crack in my story is now officially AU, given what we now know about it (unless you're watching on BBC America), so just be aware:) Thanks for all the kind reviews so far! Enjoy:)

* * *

All These Things That I've Done

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

By the time the TARDIS landed in Amy's bedroom, she'd managed to tell John all about her first encounters with the Doctor, the crack in her wall and Prisoner Zero. He took the last two things in stride, but the first part of her story, the sad tale of Amelia, bothered him.

"Twelve years?" John was incredulous. "He said five minutes and it was twelve years?"

"Fourteen if you count the two he missed later," Amy added. "For a Time Lord, he's really bad at keeping track of it."

She had a point, but he still protested, "Well, he's been known to mix up a date or two here and there, but twelve years instead of five minutes?" John shook his head. "That's something different entirely."

"How do you mean?"

"You said it yourself. He's a Time Lord. He is a Lord of Time."

When it appeared that this was all John was going to say, Amy propped her fists up on her hips. "Is this going to happen to me someday? I'll travel with him so much that I'll end up like him, refusing to give people proper answers to their questions?"

"Believe me, Amy...sounding like him is the least of the worries you should have about traveling with the Doctor."

"What happened to you?" Amy asked a second later. "Why do you seem to hate him so much?"

Seconds ticked by. "I don't hate him," John finally said. "I can't hate him."

"But you're mad at him?"

"How can you be mad at someone who gave you one of the two things he loved most in the world?"

Amy shrugged. "Easily, if you loved the thing he didn't give you more."

"Very good," John said a second later. "Wrong, but good." They landed at their final destination with the usual wheezing and whooshing. "Oh, I love that sound!" he declared. "It's a brilliant sound."

"Deja vu," Amy murmured.

"What did you say?"

"Nothing. Just...never mind."

Amy followed John into her bedroom, her forehead crinkled in deep thought. There were so many pieces to the puzzle and she had a feeling that a few very important ones were being kept from her.

"Left in a hurry, did you?" John pointed at the string of white lights threaded through the bed's headboard. "Those could start a fire."

"But...wait..." Amy looked around the room. "It's the same night."

"Same night as what?"

Spotting her wedding dress, Amy's stomach dropped. "The night I ran away with the Doctor." She blinked. "I'm not in my bed...but he said we'd only been gone five minutes."

"What are you doing? Amy?" Despite the suspicion in his tone, Amy brushed past him and ran for the big window in the hallway. John caught up only seconds later and together, they looked out over the backyard.

There was the TARDIS. There was Amy Pond in her nightgown. And there was...

"The Doctor," Amy said unnecessarily. She swallowed. "He's telling me we can go wherever I like."

"If either of them look up here and see us, the cracks in the universe won't matter, because everything will explode in the wake of the massive paradox," John warned, averting his own eyes.

She shook her head. "I won't look up. I was too excited."

John's severe expression relaxed a bit. "You waited for him a long time, didn't you?"

"I dropped everything and left with him on the night before my wedding." Amy lifted her shoulders. "Maybe it was the bow tie."

"Bow tie?" Although undeniably curious, especially now, John refused to allow himself even a small peek at the new version of the man he had once been. "Bow ties are for uncles and geography teachers!"

Amy shot him a dirty look. "Bow ties are cool."

Down below, unaware of the exchange taking place in the house, Amy and the Doctor disappeared into the TARDIS.

"Where did he take you?" John asked.

"Far away." Suddenly, her chin trembled. "I wanted him to. The farther, the better."

"On your wedding night?"

Amy sniffed, straightening her shoulders. "You should talk. You haven't married your someone."

"I asked. I even asked her in Italy." This admission hung in the air between them. "She said we weren't ready," John finished.

There was another moment of silence. "You should ask her again," Amy advised.

His Adam's apple bobbed. "It's probably too late now."

"Why do you say that?"

John glanced at the watch on his left wrist. "You said that you and the Doctor were gone five minutes, yes?" Amy nodded. "We haven't got long, then. Show me the crack."

After pointing out the place on her wall, Amy hung back as John looked it over. "I was praying to Santa about this crack when the Doctor crashed in the backyard. I thought...Santa must know what he was doing, even if he did send a mad man in a broken box." She smiled, lost in the memory. "I still can't eat beans. Or fish fing..."

"Shh!" With one ear pressed to the crack, John held up his hand to quiet her. "I can hear voices again." He frowned. "What are they saying?"

Amy frowned. "I can't hear anything."

But clearly John could. And whatever he heard emanating from the defunct crack made him back away from the wall like it had suddenly caught fire.

"What's the matter?" she asked as he walked backwards past her. "John?"

He swallowed heavily. "We should go. You and...and him...you'll be back any moment."

Amy hesitated. "Just so we're clear, I don't understand any of this and the only reason I'm going along with you is because I don't fancy being stuck out of time for the rest of my life. It would be nice, though, if you could tell me you at least have some idea of how we can bring back the Doctor."

John opened the TARDIS door. "Go on inside."

Her eyes narrowed. "You don't have a clue, do you?"

"Now."

There was too much quiet fury in his tone for Amy to ignore. Without another word, she brushed past him on her way into the TARDIS. He followed her and they departed with only seconds to spare.

* * *

_We are an impossibility in an impossible world. - Unknown_

* * *

Apples. Yogurt. Bananas. Cellophane-wrapped cupcakes. Cold take-away chips. Rose's kitchen was stocked with everything he'd once loved to eat and now couldn't stand.

With a sigh, the Doctor closed the refrigerator door only to find the woman herself standing a few feet away, watching him in the moonlight that streamed through the window.

"Can I fix you something?" Rose asked.

Politeness. Good manners. Not warmth. The Doctor ignored the question. "Shouldn't you be keeping off your feet? You did promise Jackie."

"I also promised her I would make you sleep outside tonight. Should I have kept my word there, too?"

Seconds passed as he watched her pour herself a glass of milk with trembling hands. After she took a sip, she cleared her throat. "You said...it was radiation poisoning that made you change. But how..."

"Like I told you...it was for a good cause. To save someone who wasn't at all important," he clarified.

Rose let out a reluctant chuckle. "Yeah. Sounds like you, all right." She looked up, into his eyes. "Were you alone?" He inclined his chin. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "You shouldn't have had to be alone."

"Couldn't be helped." The Doctor's smile was crooked. "Got a new look for the TARDIS out of it, though."

"A new TARDIS? So, then...nothing's the same? Everything's changed?"

"Everything always does," he reminded her. "You certainly have. Changed and moved on with your life like I knew you would." He gestured to her stomach. "But even I couldn't have guessed you would move quite so fast."

Rose stared at him. "It's been six years since you left us on that bloody beach!"

The Doctor held up a calming hand. "I'm not upset, Rose."

She dropped her eyes back down to her glass of milk. "Of course not. Why would you be?" She paused. "I haven't changed all that much, you know."

"No," he admitted. "I suppose not. Not where it counts, at least."

As Rose sipped her milk in silence, the Doctor spotted a photograph stuck to the side of the fridge with a magnet. He reached for it and spent the next minute analyzing the image of the man he'd once seen in the mirror every day, standing in front of the Leaning Tower of Pisa, his arms around Rose and a huge smile plastered on his face.

"Italian holiday?" the Doctor asked.

She nodded, rubbing her belly. "We think it's where this happened."

It was an unnecessary comment, but it served its purpose. For a fleeting second, hurt darkened the Doctor's eyes, as if the idea of his doppelganger tangled up with Rose in Italian sheets, doing all the things it took to create a new life, was physically painful.

But in true form, he quickly recovered. "Well, if you insist on risking the wrath of Jackie by not resting properly, then we should get back to work."

"On what?" Abandoning her milk, Rose followed the Doctor out of the kitchen and through the cottage towards the nursery. "We still don't understand how you and John...what exactly happened to make you switch. So how can we possibly..."

"When I regenerated in front of you, I said that I changed my body, every single cell." They reached the empty, mostly-lilac nursery and the Doctor turned to face her. "That's only mostly true."

"But you became completely different." Rose glanced at his bow tie. "You're completely different now."

"No, not completely, Rose. Not completely at all." He tapped his temple. "My mind is always the same. I knew you, remember? Straight away after I changed, I knew who you were, the adventures we'd had and..." He stopped short."

Rose's heart thudded beneath her breast. "And what?"

His face was so young, but his eyes were haunted. "It's like dying and being reborn, it's true. Everything is raw and new and I spend weeks figuring my new body out, but the memories and the feelings...they always carry over. Wouldn't be the Doctor without them."

"Feelings?" She hesitated. "Like...love?" He said nothing. "John loves me," she blurted out. "On the beach...he told me."

"Well, one life, one heart..." The Doctor tried to smile and failed. "We're not the same man. We never were."

"But you had the same mind at one time." Rose blinked. "That's it, isn't it? The thing that's connected you then...is connecting you still."

With her attention temporarily diverted, the Doctor ran into the nursery. "The thing that pulled us both out of our worlds." He patted down his messy hair. "This daft, Time Lord mind we share. Oh, we're different, to be sure." He made a face. "He's still eating apples, evil things. And he knows things I will only ever dream about, but the crack...the crack is just energy. Can't tell the difference. Get too close to it, probably at the same time and..." The Doctor pressed his ear to the crack. "Chaos."

Against her better judgment, Rose walked up behind him. "Doctor?"

He held up a hand. "Shh. I think I can hear something."

"What is it..." Rose cleared her throat and pressed on. "What is it that he knows...that you dream about?"

"It doesn't matter," he insisted.

"You know it does."

The Doctor straightened up and looked down at her. "This is hardly the right time."

"You're a Time Lord. Make it the right time."

Still, he hesitated, like a man under torture, desperately wanting to give in, but knowing that if he did, nothing would ever be the same.

"Doctor, I swear..." Rose started.

"He knows you!" the Doctor finally conceded. "He lives with you, eats with you...sleeps with you. He knows Rose Tyler in a way that I never will."

Her eyes flooded. "Could've done," she whispered.

"Wanted to." He cupped her cheek in his unfamiliar hand. "Two regenerations and that hasn't changed."

The moment was broken by the faintest sound emanating from the crack.

The whoosh of the TARDIS.

* * *

To Be Continued


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Thank you so much for the incredibly kind feedback. I hope you keep having fun reading this:) Enjoy!

* * *

All These Things That I've Done

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

"Are you going to tell me where we're going?"

If John heard her, or even acknowledged her presence, he did a good job of hiding it. He was searching the racks of the TARDIS wardrobe, pushing aside cricket sweaters and black leather jackets with mounting frustration.

"John?" she tried again, louder this time. When he still ignored her, she tried a different approach. "What exactly are you looking for?"

Whatever it was, he landed upon it right then. A smile spread across his face as he lifted out a long, brown trench coat. "Hello, old friend," John said to the garment. "Oh...I've missed you."

"Something you left behind?" Amy guessed.

"In a manner of speaking." Tossing aside the hanger, John slipped the coat on over his T-shirt and jeans. "Blimey." He moved his arms experimentally. "Bit tighter than I remembered."

Amy smirked. "Maybe you've just gotten bigger."

"Meh..." he conceded, patting his trim, but no longer quite so slim stomach. "Not nearly enough running anymore."

The coat must have had some magical power; it had lifted John's mood out of the dumps where it had been firmly lodged ever since they'd left Amy's bedroom.

He had flat-out refused to tell her what had bothered him so much. He'd merely set a course and then torn off in search of the coat, leaving Amy with the worrying realization that even though the Doctor was gone, she was still traveling in a box with a mad man.

But maybe he'd moved past it now. Perhaps he just needed something to make him smile.

As John was still adjusting to the fit of the coat, Amy turned her attention to the wardrobe. They were in a different section than the one she'd perused in order to find the outfit she now wore. Perhaps this area was reserved for costume clothes, like the blinding pink poodle skirt that caught her eye.

The skirt was on the same hanger as a short, fitted blue jacket. Amy took them both and ducked behind the wall of clothes to change.

"What do you think?" she asked a second before she stepped back in view. "Am I ready for the hop, daddy-o?"

The grin on John's face vanished. His eyes, so light a moment earlier, grew dark. "Take those off."

Amy frowned. "It was meant to be a laugh. What's your problem, mate?"

He swallowed heavily. "Please."

When she came back out a minute later, redressed in her red sweater and black shorts, he was staring at himself in the mirror.

"I'm sorry," John said. "It's just...that outfit...it reminds me of a different time. When I was a different man."

Amy approached him cautiously. "It's all right, you know." She put a tentative hand on his shoulder. "Plenty of blokes like to wear skirts. It's nothing to be ashamed of."

His body shook beneath her hand and until he threw back his head, she didn't recognize that he was laughing. John reached back to squeeze her fingers. "Come on, then. We'll have landed by now."

She followed him back to the console room, careful to keep from tripping over the trailing ends of his precious coat as they dashed down the short flight of stairs.

"But where have we landed?" Amy demanded.

"Look for yourself." John indicated the door. "Go on."

As she stepped outside, Amy squinted at the sunlight. "It's...Earth," she guessed. Turning around, she took in the houses, cars and lawns. "England. But..." She shook her head. "That's all I've got."

John joined her, adjusting the collar of his coat. "London," he informed her. "Ever been?"

"On a school trip once, but it was all museums and galleries and cathedrals," Amy said. "What part of London is this?"

"One of the best," he promised. "And..." His eyes scanned the neighborhood. "If memory serves me right, the house we're looking for is..." He stopped and pointed. "Just there."

"Who lives there?" Amy wondered.

John was already off and running. All she could do was follow him up to the front door. He knocked with a flourish, looking like a young child on Christmas morning.

But when a heavyset woman in a blue sari answered, some of his enthusiasm wavered. "Excuse me," John said to the woman. "Does the Noble family still live here?"

The woman shook her head. "No. This is my house. They have not lived here for two years."

"Do you know where they moved to?" he pressed.

"Kensington? Perhaps it was Chelsea. I cannot remember." She started to close the door, but John stopped it with his foot.

"They're friends of mine. I need to find them."

"Everyone is now a friend of theirs," the woman snorted softly. "That is what comes with money." With that, she forcibly slammed the door shut.

"We should go," Amy suggested after a few seconds of silence passed. She tugged on John's sleeve. "C'mon."

"It doesn't make any sense," John said as they walked back to the TARDIS. "Money? They never had money. She would have said if they'd had it hidden away somewhere. She wouldn't have ever stopped talking about it."

"You mentioned Donna Noble awhile back. Is that who you're looking for?" Amy asked.

They reached the blue box. "Yes. She'll be able to help us. We have to find Donna." With a snap of his fingers, John opened the doors.

The first thing they both saw upon entering the TARDIS was a slender woman standing at the console with her back to them. Upon hearing them enter, she turned around.

"You know, you really ought to be more careful." She shook her head with amused patience, her dark braids swaying back and forth. "Leaving the door open like that. Anyone could wander in."

John took a step forward, staring up at the new arrival with wonder. "Martha Jones...is that really you?"

"Actually, it's Smith-Jones now." She held up one slender hand, putting a small, but lovely diamond on display. Lowering her arm, her smile faltered and her voice wobbled. "I thought we'd lost you, Doctor."

He said nothing. He only crossed the distance between them and enfolded Martha in a huge hug.

"Excuse me?" Amy abruptly interrupted the reunion. "What did you just call him?"

* * *

_The universe is full of magical things, patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper. - Eden Phillpotts _

* * *

"You heard that, didn't you?" Rose pointed at the wall. "The TARDIS. I swear...I heard the TARDIS!"

The Doctor tried to stop her, but she was already at the wall. "John!" she yelled into the crack. "John, are you there? Can you hear me?"

He came up behind her. "Rose, please come away from there. It's not safe."

"But I heard it. I know it's him." She pressed the heel of her hand against her heart. "I can feel him."

The Doctor reached for her. "We don't know enough about the crack and it's not safe for you to..."

"I want him back." Leaning heavily against the wall, Rose's wet eyes darted back and forth, focusing on nothing. "I want him back," she repeated. Shrugging off his hand, she looked up at him. "Bring him back."

The precious moment that had just passed between them was gone. The Doctor cleared his throat. "I don't know that I can."

His admission hung in the air between them.

"What're you saying?" Rose finally asked. "You're not even going to try?"

He held up his hands in his own defense. "No, no, that's definitely not what I'm saying. What I am saying is that this crack is just as much of a mystery to me as it was to him. I haven't figured it all out yet, that's all. And I never will if you get too close to it and get sucked away, too."

Reluctantly, Rose stepped away from the wall.

"Thank you," he said with a small sigh. "I promise you, Rose Tyler, I will do my best to bring him back here."

"You never break your promises," she murmured. "That part's always left to me."

The Doctor frowned. "When did you ever break a promise?"

"I promised that I'd stay with you forever, remember?" She lifted her shoulder. "I didn't."

"You couldn't," he corrected her. "It wasn't your fault. It was just..."

"Destiny?" Rose guessed. "Do you really believe that?"

The Doctor countered, "Do you?" He gestured around the room. "Was all of this meant to be?"

"You made this happen," she reminded him. "You left us here."

He inclined his chin. "It was for the good of the universe. He was dangerous."

"To the Daleks! Did you really think he was going to kill anyone else? Like he'd wake up one morning and decide to wipe out...I don't know...all bunny rabbits?" Upset now, Rose put a hand to her stomach. "The Daleks wanted to erase every other living thing from existence and you were going to let them go, to try again another day. As far as I'm concerned, you're the dangerous one!"

Slowly, the Doctor turned away from her. "It was genocide."

"It was the right thing to do," she argued. "He made every world, every universe safe...and what did he get for it?" Rose rushed on, "He got stuck here without a screwdriver, without the TARDIS, with..."

"You." He didn't look at her as he added, "I wouldn't call that a punishment."

Rose drew in a ragged breath. "So...what? You gave me to him? Like a toy you didn't want anymore?"

"Oh, Rose." Exasperated, he turned his neck to see her. "You can't believe it was that simple."

"I don't know." She hung her head, looking down at the swell of her belly. "I just know that I go over and over that day on the beach in my mind, trying to figure out exactly what you were thinking." Rose lifted her eyes. "Trying to find the moment when you decided to leave us behind."

The Doctor couldn't look at her as he said, "It wasn't on the beach." He closed his eyes. "It was on the Crucible, when I realized what he was."

When he opened his eyes, Rose was at the door. "I'm going to bed. There's linens in the hall closet and the couch downstairs folds out."

"Rose..."

"Goodnight."

The way she spit out the word, like it tasted bad, kept him from following her as she left the room.

* * *

To Be Continued


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: I started this chapter last year, in the middle of Series Five. I wanted to finish it then, but it just never happened. So now here we are, at the start of Series Six, and I found myself revisiting this story. Maybe no one cares after all this time, but that's okay. I'd like to try and finish it anyway:) If you've been waiting for the next chapter, thank you so much for all of your patience. And if you're reading this for the first time, thank you for giving it a shot. Hopefully, it won't be a year until the next update;)

* * *

All These Things That I've Done

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

"Wait...don't tell me." Before John could stop her, Martha started down the stairs towards Amy. "Something happened to turn Donna back into a teenager, only now she doesn't know who you are?" She reached for Amy's hand and patted it sympathetically. "I know this is all a bit overwhelming, Donna, but the Doctor will find a way to fix everything. He always does."

Amy stared at John. "Your friend's mad. I hope you know that."

John dragged his hand through his hair and then down the length of his jaw. "Martha, that's not Donna. That's Amy."

Martha frowned. "Amy?"

"Yes, that's my name." It was Amy's turn to pat Martha's hand. "And his name is John."

"John?" Martha shook her head slightly. "Doctor, what's going on here? Why are you going by John? Where's Donna?" She looked him up and down. "And when did you start wearing jeans?"

"This all very...complicated," John began, "and very hard to explain."

"I can keep up," Amy said dryly.

"You know I can," Martha chimed.

"Why does she think you're the Doctor?" Amy demanded.

"And why does she think you're not?" Martha countered.

John held up his hands in surrender. "If it makes you feel better, you're both right." He hesitated. "And wrong."

"Oh, yeah," Amy snorted. "Loads better."

"I'm not wrong," Martha argued. "How do you think I found you? UNIT monitors all CCT cameras around the world, searching for any sign of the TARDIS."

"You're still with UNIT?" John sighed, disappointed.

"What's UNIT?"

Ignoring Amy, Martha glared at him. "No, I'm not. But Mickey and I have access to their computer systems and when we saw that you'd landed in London, I teleported here straight away."

John's eyebrows lifted. "You're with Mickey? Mickey's the 'Smith' in Smith-Jones?"

Amy raised her hand. "Who's Mickey?"

"Why does that surprise you?" Martha folded her arms. "You've seen us together. You saved us from a Sontaran." She thought about this. "Or...you will. Someday." She hesitated for a second before walking back to him. "You are the Doctor. Aren't you?"

John looked her in the eye. "Yes and no."

"It can't be both," Martha insisted.

"Really?" he asked, leveling her with his deep brown stare. "Can't it, Martha Smith-Jones? The woman who walked the Earth for a year that never was? The woman who watched over a Time Lord when he was human? The woman the Sontarans cloned?"

"Cloned..." Her dark eyes widened. "Oh my god! Of course! You're the other one! The Doctor in the blue suit!"

He tried to smile. "I go by 'John' now."

"I never even wondered...I mean, what happened to you...after?" Martha's forehead wrinkled. "And where's the Doctor? You know...the...um..."

"The real Doctor?"

She blushed, guilty. "Sorry. I didn't know exactly how to put that."

"Neither do I," John admitted. "But to answer your question, I believe he's in a paralell universe." He paused. "With..."

Martha didn't even hesitate. "Rose. Of course." She smiled sadly. "That sounds like him, all right."

"How he got there will take a bit longer to explain. Right now, we have got to find Donna!" John turned back to the controls. "Might as well start with Chelsea and work our way..."

"STOP!"

Both John and Martha stared. Amy might have been slender and ginger, but she had a hell of a pair of lungs.

"I have no idea who either of you are, but one of you had better start explaining things to me right now!" Her eyes narrowed into dangerously thin slits. "You aren't a clone of the Doctor," she told John. "You don't look a thing like him."

John glanced at Martha. "Not anymore, no." His former companion frowned. "Martha, when was the last time you saw him? The real Doctor."

"About a year ago. Mickey and I spent our honeymoon fighting off a troop of Sontarans." She lowered her eyes, remembering. "You...I mean, he was on a balcony looking down at us...like it was the last time he'd ever see us. And I thought..." When she looked back up at him, they were wet with unshed tears. "I just felt...like it was the last time I would ever see him, too."

"It was," he murmured. "I think that he was dying." Martha's lashes lowered again and her tears spilled over. "And I think he was saying goodbye."

John turned to Amy a second later. "The first time you saw the Doctor all those years ago...what did he say to you?"

"He said a lot of things!" Amy shook her head. "Crazy things! He ate fish fingers with custard, for god's sake!"

"Try to remember," John urged her. "You said he climbed out of the TARDIS...and then what did he say?"

Amy sighed. "The pool...it was in the library. He wanted an apple. And..." Her forehead crinkled. "He said he was still cooking."

"Still cooking." John glanced back at Martha. "The last time you saw the Doctor, he still looked like me, but that body was dying. And the first time Amy saw the Doctor...he had just regenerated. Changed his entire body, got a brand new face, just to stay alive. See?" He grinned. "I told you that you were both right."

Amy blinked. "Does that make any sense to you?" she asked Martha.

"As much as anything the Doctor said ever did," she admitted. "So...Donna, then?"

"Donna," John nodded.

As the human clone of the former Doctor started up the TARDIS, Amy put a hand to her aching forehead. "Should I even ask who Donna is? Would you even tell me if I did ask?"

"Donna Noble," Martha informed her. "Former companion of the Doctor. My Doctor," she clarified. "The only person in the world who might be able to figure all of this out."

"She'll be able to bring back my Doctor? The real Doctor?" Amy sniffed and crossed her arms. "About bloody time someone did."

* * *

_What makes the universe so hard to comprehend is that there's nothing to compare it with. - Unknown_

* * *

Rose woke up the next morning to the scent of bacon. Her stomach rumbled and smile spread across her face. Never one for a lie-in, John must have woken early and started breakfast. If he was frying bacon, he'd also scramble a couple of eggs and throw on some shredded cheese. There would be tea and toast with marmalade...her absolute favorite.

She smiled and stretched her arm towards the other side of the bed, as if reaching for her lover. He wasn't there, of course, but that wasn't what caused her to frown. It was the lack of warmth and the pristine conditon of the sheets that made her heart sink.

John wasn't downstairs. He hadn't slept beside her during the night. He wasn't even in the same universe.

But there was still bacon frying. She wasn't alone.

It took more effort than usual to get out of bed. Her belly felt like it had expanded a few inches in the past eight hours, a fact which made her grumble as she pulled on her robe and stepped into her slippers. Just how much bigger was she going to get, anyway? Any more and she was bound to pop!

The stairs were tricky. Rose took them one at time, grasping both the railing and the wall for support. By the time she reached the bottom, she was out of breath and there was a twinge of pain in her lower back that she couldn't seem to rub away.

She waddled into the kitchen only to find the tall, gangly man who called himself the Doctor standing at her stove. He had shed his tweed jacket and tied an apron around his waist. And he was humming as he cooked.

"Good morning, Rose," he greeted her without even turning around. "Do you still eat bacon? I can't stand the stuff, but you're all out of ham." He finally looked back at her and the sight of him in an apron that said 'Domestic Goddess' brought a reluctant smile to her lips. "I like ham. With mayonaise."

It was like the previous night with all of its painful confessions had never happened. Rose moved forward, ignoring her aching back. "Bacon is ham," she reminded him.

He made a face that was eerily similar to the one his predecessor had made upon tasting human blood on board the Sycorax ship. "Bacon wishes it could be ham again," he declared. "Did you sleep well?"

She chose not to answer this as she awkwardly lowered herself into a chair at the kitchen table. "Did you?"

"Couldn't sleep. Too quiet here." The Doctor started opening cabinets until he found a stack of plates. "Too much on my mind."

"There's always too much on your mind."

"Fair enough." His grin faded. "You were crying. In your sleep. I could hear you."

With both hands on her rounded belly, Rose blew out a slow breath. "Lots on my mind, too, I suppose."

A minute later, the Doctor set a steaming plate of fried eggs and bacon in front of her. "Eat up. We've got a busy day ahead of us."

Taking the fork he offered her, Rose arched an eyebrow. "We have?"

"It's going take every bit of my rather impressive brain to figure out a way to set the universe straight again."

Rose paused with a forkful of eggs halfway to her mouth. "Can it be done? Really?" She lowered her fork. "Can you bring him back?"

The new Doctor had the face of boy and the eyes of an old man. She had to look away from them; they were too much to bear. To distract herself, Rose tried to start eating again, but as soon as she lifted the fork, the pain in her back doubled.

"Rose?" The Doctor frowned when her body suddenly jerked. "What is it?"

"Nothing." As she breathed deeply, the pain faded back into a dull ache. She tried to smile. "Being pregnant is so much fun."

He watched her as she ate her breakfast, bite by bite, until her stomach wouldn't hold anything else. When she was done, the Doctor whisked the plate away to the sink. As soon as his back was turned, Rose let her chin drop down to her chest.

The pain was back, even worse this time.

"You asked me if I could bring him back," the Doctor said a moment later as he ran the dish under the water. "Silly question. I can do anything I put my mind to."

"Of course," she hissed between her teeth as she fought to keep from crying out. The cramp in her back had spread around to her abdomen.

"But I think I had better hurry up and do something brilliant to get him back here as soon as possible," he continued. "Because, Rose Tyler..." The Doctor turned around with the strangest look on his face. "You are going into labor."

* * *

To Be Continued


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Thank you so much to everyone who is reading this story; I am so grateful for all the kind reviews and comments;) I hope you enjoy this chapter just as much!

* * *

All These Things That I've Done

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

After five straight minutes of watching John circling the console, looking over each bit and every bob, Amy gave up trying to figure out what he was searching for and took off on the same path that Martha had taken into the further reaches of the TARDIS.

She didn't have to search long before she found the Doctor's former companion standing in the middle of the white and grey corridor, staring at a bare expanse of wall.

As Amy approached her, Martha answered the girl's unspoken question. "There used to be a door here. It was my room." She lifted her shoulder, but the gesture was neither carefree nor dismissive. "Better that it's gone, I suppose. Why waste space on what's past?"

"I think a lot of rooms got shifted," Amy told her. "Yours might still be around. Just not where you left it exactly."

Martha glanced at her. "How long have you been traveling with him?"

"I have no idea." Amy's forehead crinkled when she realized the truth behind her answer. "It feels like just a few days, but I know it's been more than that. Back home, though...I've been gone five, maybe ten minutes."

The older woman nodded. "That's how it goes with the Doctor. When you're in this box...when it seems like time should be the most important thing in your world...you completely lose track of it."

"Is that why you left?"

The ghost of smile played across Martha's lips. "No. I'm afraid it was much more complicated than that."

"Well, with a face like he had back then, it must have been a really good reason," Amy concluded. There was a moment of quiet before she dared to ask, "So...you knew Rose, yeah?"

"Yes." Martha turned and started walking back towards the console room. "And no."

Amy followed close behind. "Which is it?"

"I knew of her, but I really only met her once," Martha replied evenly.

"Who was she? To the Doctor, I mean."

Martha's gait slowed just for a second. "Amy, do you believe that everyone has one great love of their life?"

The question caught Amy off guard. "I'd like to think so." An image of Rory's smile came to her mind. "Sure. I do." Blinking out of her thoughts, Amy frowned. "Was Rose...?"

"After the TARDIS..." They entered the console room just then and Martha finished with a simple, "Yes."

John looked up as the Doctor's companions appeared at the top of the short flight of steps. "How long have you two been gone?"

"Oh, hours," Martha teased. "Thanks for noticing before now."

John rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. "Been busy, you know. As much as everything is the same here, it's all different, too. I can't seem to figure out..." He trailed off as something new caught his eye. But when he pulled the lever, there was nothing but a cold rush of wind, as if he'd turned on some sort of invisible fan.

"What are you looking for?" Amy finally asked.

"I should be able to call her up straight away," John mused, as he grabbed the view screen with both hands. "Can't figure out why I can't get a signal lock on this thing."

In his mind, it was probably a very complete answer to her question, but Amy was quite put out at being ignored yet again. Fortunately, Martha had a lot more experience in deciphering Doctor-speak. "You're searching for Donna, aren't you?"

"I...he...he always keeps a trace on his companions. It's not weird," John hastily added. "It's just for their own safety. It's not as if he follows their every move, but from time to time, he does have to make sure they're where they're supposed to be. But for some reason..." John lightly slapped the leather-covered screen. "She won't locate Donna."

This set Martha on edge. "You don't think anything's happened to her, do you?"

"No, no, there is a signal. She's out there. But the TARDIS won't lock onto her position. It's like...she doesn't want me to find her."

While they were talking, Amy slipped her phone out of her pocket. "It was Donna Noble, wasn't it?" she interrupted.

"Yeah," Martha confirmed as she joined John at the console. Amy was forgotten as she pointed out a button. "Try that one."

"Already did." John ran his hand through his hair. "Wouldn't recommend pressing it again."

From her spot on the landing above them, Amy only had to tap the surface of her phone a dozen times before she found exactly what they were looking for.

"Donna Temple-Noble, 41 St. Alban's Court Road, Kensington." Both John and Martha looked back at her in surprise. Amy pocketed her phone with satisfaction. "You're welcome."

"Hey, you heard the girl," Martha told John a second later. "Kensington, it is."

"And step on it," Amy added. "With any luck, my Doctor will be back in time for tea."

* * *

_The universe, they said, depended for its operation the balance of four forces which they identified as charm, persuasion, uncertainty and bloody-mindedness. - Terry Pratchett_

* * *

"No."

The one word made the Doctor blink. "No? What do you mean, 'no'?"

"You heard me perfectly well." Rose shook her head as she drew in a deep, calming breath. "I am not having this baby today."

With the handle of the spatula he'd used to cook her breakfast, the Doctor stratched the back of his head. "Mind you, I don't know this about humans for certain, but I've been lead to believe that this isn't something you get to decide either way." Still grasping the spatula, he gestured to her stomach and the child within. "Isn't it up to him?"

"If he knows what's good for him, he'll stay put," she scowled.

"Rose." Setting the utensil aside, the Doctor reached for her hand. "He's a little bit Time Lord, a fair bit Noble and a whole lot of Tyler. What on earth makes you think he's ever going to follow orders?"

She let out a laugh that could have been mistaken for a sob. "I hate when you do that, you know."

His smile was sad. "I know. That's mostly why I do it." Threading his long fingers through hers, he squeezed lightly. "Is it time?"

Rose blew out a pent-up breath and nodded with great reluctance. She wouldn't have been able to carry off the lie for very long, she told herself. If there was one thing the Doctor recognized it was when anyone was in pain.

"Yeah, I think so." A second later, her face crumpled. "But I'm not ready!" she cried. Her fear-stricken expression cut straight through him like a knife. "I don't think I can do this, Doctor!"

"Don't be ridiculous," he scoffed, gently, but firmly. "You're the girl who faced the Dalek emperor and won." He wiped a tear off her cheek before it reached her chin. "You can do anything, Rose Tyler. That I do know for certain."

"What about John?" She lowered her lashes for the briefest of moments. "I need him here."

When he could, the Doctor looked back and forth between her eyes. "I'm going to get him back in time. For you." He tried to smile again. "I promise."

"What if you can't?" Rose whispered.

His forehead touched hers for a second before he drew back and kissed her brow. "That's not an option."

One phone call and ten minutes later, Jackie Tyler burst into the house like a hurricane, shouting Rose's name at the top of her very powerful lungs.

As Rose was lying on the couch, caught up in the middle of the strongest contraction yet, it was the Doctor who greeted her mother when she found them in the parlor.

"Hello, Jackie." He waved the hand that Rose didn't have a death grip on. "It's me. Sorry 'bout the face-change. Again."

Jackie ignored him and rushed to her daughter's side, fairly knocking him out of the way. "Rose, sweetheart, can you hear me?"

"Mum...I'm having...a baby." Rose gritted her teeth against the pain. "I'm not...going deaf."

Great big tears welled up in Jackie's eyes, threatening to ruin her liberally-applied makeup. "My baby is having a baby! I can't believe it!"

With the contraction easing away, Rose threw the Doctor a look. "And this is after she's had nine months to come to terms with it."

It was just his luck that at that exact moment, Jackie finally acknowledged him. "What are you smirking for?" His smile died as she pointed a manicured finger at him. "This is some of your fault, you know!"

The Doctor blinked. "It is?"

"You left that other Doctor here and he," she indicated her daughter's belly, "did this!"

"Mum!"

Jackie narrowed her glare as she looked the Doctor up and down. "How's it that you keep getting younger? Is that the deal with your lot? You age backwards? Next time, you'll need a nappy, you will!"

The Doctor pulled at his chin. "Oh, it's so good to see you, too, Jackie."

Rose struggled to look at them from over the mound of her stomach. "Can this bit wait until after?"

For a split second, Jackie looked properly chastised. "Of course, darling. Let's get you to the hospital, shall we?"

She made a motion to help Rose stand, but the Doctor was already sliding his arms under Rose's legs in order to lift her off the couch.

"What are you doing?" Rose protested. "I told you before...you can't pick me up; I'm a bloody zeppelin!"

"If I have to leave you on your own with your mother, the least I can do is carry you to the car," the Doctor said in a voice just low enough to escape Jackie's hearing. As he moved through the house with her in his arms, he went on, "Jackie isn't all together wrong. This is my fault. I should have listened to Amy and left the crack alone. He might still be here if I had."

Rose searched the strange face that she somehow felt she knew so well. "Amy, eh? Should have guessed there would be an Amy."

Once outside, the Doctor set her onto her feet beside Jackie's car. "And if you think you've been replaced, you're very wrong. But my life had to move forward, too. Yes, there is an Amy and if it wouldn't punch yet another hole in the universe, I would love it if you two met someday. For right now, though, you've got more important things to worry about, eh?"

After a second, Rose nodded. "Suppose I do, yeah." The Doctor opened the passenger door and helped her lower herself into the seat. Before he could close the door, she stopped it with her hand. "Doctor?"

"Trust me, Rose. I will bring him back. He will not miss this."

"But how?"

The Doctor offered her his most charming smile. "Knowing me, I'll figure something out."

Rose scowled at him as Jackie plopped behind the wheel. "Is that supposed to make me feel better?"

She waited for a reply, but all he did was close the door and kiss his fingers before pressing them against the glass. The car took off just then, rambling down the road towards the city.

Back in the house, the Doctor placed a second phone call.

To Torchwood.

* * *

To Be Continued


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: Characters contained within do not belong to me.

Author's Notes: Thank you so, so much to everyone who's taking the time to read and/or review. I appreciate it more than I can say. Enjoy!

* * *

All These Things That I've Done

by Kristen Elizabeth

* * *

The TARDIS landed in Hyde Park, only a few blocks away from St. Alban's Court. It was summer in England and the fresh air carried the scent of blossoming flowers and sweet grass. Only the faintest tinge of exhaust fumes served as a reminder that they were in the middle of one of the biggest, busiest cities in the world.

"I forget sometimes, being away, how much I love London." Stepping out of the blue doors, Martha turned her face up to the warmth of the sun. "Mickey and I really should come home more often."

John turned around, the long tails of his brown coat billowing around his legs, until he got his bearings. "We should head that way." He pointed to the high, stone gates that led out onto the street.

They were an odd, yet undeniably good-looking trio as they walked the stone path out of the park. Strangely enough, it was Amy who took the lead, while Martha hung back at John's side.

"Do you really think Donna can help?" she asked him, keeping her voice low.

John dug his hands into his coat pockets, exactly as the Doctor always had when he needed to stall for time. "'Course I do!" he replied, a bit too brightly. "She's got a part-Time Lord brain, she does. Who better to figure this all out?"

"Well...your brain is part-Time Lord with all the memories of the Doctor, right? And you've got a TARDIS." Martha cleared her throat with great delicacy. "So...what's Donna supposed to do that you can't?"

"She's got the human imagination in her, remember?" John paused. "Which I have, as well, come to think of it." Martha said nothing, but he gave in with a sigh. "All right, honestly, I have no idea. I hate to admit it, but I'm grasping at straws, hoping something comes to me." He looked at the back of Amy's red head. "Maybe I really just want to see Donna again."

"Nothing wrong with that." Martha slipped her arm through his as they walked. "Old friends are good. Speaking of..." She hesitated. "How's Rose?"

The smile that lit up his brown eyes at the sound of her name was enough of an answer for Martha, but she waited for him to reply. "She's...huge."

Martha coughed and recovered. "Excuse me?"

With a wink, John added, "She's pregnant."

"Oh. Blimey..." Taking a deep breath, Martha shook off her shock. "Um...congratulations? I assume you're the..."

"Yeah," he confirmed. The fatherly pride his tone faded a second later as he realized who he was talking to. "Martha, I didn't mean to..."

She waved her hand dismissively. "It's all right. No offense, but I got over you a long time ago."

A shadow crossed his face. "You were badly treated. And I am sorry. I am so sorry."

"Badly treated? Are you joking? I saw the year five billion! Shakespeare wrote a sonnet about me! I saved the entire world with a single word!" Martha forgave him with a smile. "Hardly mistreatment."

He looked down at her. "You know what I mean."

"I found Mickey. Or he found me. Either way, whatever else happened...it was meant to happen. To bring us together. So stop apologizing because I wouldn't change a thing." She thought for a second. "Except for that quicksand on Messaline. I could do without that memory."

"Sorry, I don't have the power to wipe memories anymore." A cold shiver suddenly ran down his spine. "Wipe memories..."

Amy turned around to face them. "Having a nice chat back there?" Sometime during their talk, they had left the park and were now on the bustling sidewalks of Kensington. "I think I know where we're going, but I'm the only one here who doesn't know Donna Noble from the next girl. Maybe one of you should take the lead now?"

"Do you talk to the Doctor like this?" Martha wondered. When Amy just smirked, she nodded her approval. "Good. He needs it every now and then."

Instead of protesting, John let the comment slide. His brow was furred, as if he was working through something complicated in his mind.

"Oh, you know it's true," Martha teased, hoping to coax the frown off his face. "You know it better than anyone."

Amy shook her head. "Like an old, married couple, you two are."

Martha quickly cleared her throat. "So, I'll lead then, yes?" Without waiting for confirmation, she detached herself from John's side and set a brisk pace until she was ahead of Amy.

Glancing back at John, Amy asked, "You okay?"

"Um...yeah. Yes." He shook his head to clear it. "Nothing. Everything's fine. Just..." He nodded, but it was more for his benefit than for hers. "...fine."

"All right..." Unconvinced, but unwilling to press any further, Amy started after Martha, only glancing back to make sure John was following.

He was, but his frown wasn't going anywhere.

They took a left down Victoria Road, heading further into the posh neighborhood. The townhouses were picturesque, the trees and shrubs were expertly pruned and even the streets themselves were clean and free of trash.

"I could live here," Amy decided as she caught up to Martha. "Donna must do well for herself."

"Actually, I thought she said she was a temp," Martha admitted. "Not that a temp can't do well for herself, but I wonder now if I misunderstood her."

"Maybe she married up."

Martha smiled. "If so, he must have completely swept her off her feet. She told me once that she was going to be with the Doctor forever."

Suddenly, Amy stopped and pointed. "There. That's St. Alban's Court."

But rather than the street sign, Martha stopped short at the sight of something else. "And there's Donna."

Following Martha's stare to the other side of the busy street, Amy saw a woman with a brilliant mane of copper hair standing at the corner, waiting for the light to change, one hand firmly on the pram by her side.

"I don't believe it! She went and had a baby!" Raising her voice to be heard over the traffic, Martha shouted. "Donna! Donna, over here!"

"Martha, don't!" Out of nowhere, John barreled into Martha, forcibly spinning her around until she was facing away from the street. Amy watched as Donna, who had looked up at the sound of her name, searched for a familiar face in the crowds. Finding none, she turned her attention back to the light. It just changed right then, allowing her to cross to their side of the street.

When it became clear that Donna was going to pass right by them, John dragged Martha into the recessed doorway of a townhouse, plunging them both into the safety of the shadows.

"Amy!" John's voice was dark with warning. "Do not say a word to her."

The Amy who hadn't yet traveled with the Doctor might have ignored him. But this new Amy knew better. She smiled at Donna as the older woman passed by, the way anyone might acknowledge a total stranger who was walking with a cute, plump baby. Donna returned the faint, impersonal smile and kept going, leaving only the lingering scent of baby powder and expensive perfume.

In the doorway, Martha shoved John away from her. "What are you playing at? That's Donna! We need her to..."

"No!" His eyes were huge, like they only became when he was at his most frantic. "We can't talk to her! We can't even let her see us, Martha!"

She hesitated. "Why not?"

"The meta-crisis." John cursed at himself. "I'm thick! So thick that I nearly destroyed my best..." He stopped to catch his breath. "Donna took on a Time-Lord consciousness when she made me. No human can handle that, not even someone as strong as her." When Martha only shook her head, clearly not understanding what he was saying, John went on, "It would have destroyed her. Literally burned out her brain." A beat passed. "He would have known that. He would have stopped it. By wiping her memories."

"You mean...Donna doesn't remember anything about you or him?" Martha swallowed. "She wouldn't know us at all?"

John grimaced. "Worse. If she had seen us, if she had remembered anything about us..." He didn't need to finish the thought. "She's just Donna now. Like she was when he first met her, on her wedding day. Donna before the Doctor. A much different woman than the one you knew."

"Oh, Donna..." Martha lowered her eyes. "I don't think I realized until right now...how much that time in the TARDIS meant to me. It's made me who I am. If it was ever taken away from me..." She sniffed and looked up at him. "I would be so much less if I had never met you."

"Met him," John corrected.

"Do you remember standing with me on that hospital balcony, on the moon, looking at the Earth?" When John lowered his chin in acknowledgement, she surprised him by leaning forward and kissing his cheek. "Then...thank you."

Amy interrupted their hug a second later. "I really hope one of you explains why we just let the person who could bring the Doctor back go right past us without a word."

"Because." Stepping away from Martha, John's lip curled up in a dangerous snarl. "This is life in the TARDIS, Amy. Life with the Doctor. Good people get hurt. Get used to it!" With his hands plunged so deeply into his coat pockets that they threatened to tear out the lining, John stalked away in the opposite direction that Donna had taken.

"He lied to me," Amy said a moment later. "He does hate the Doctor."

"I think," Martha eventually replied, "like with everything that has to do with this crazy life we chose, it's not nearly as simple as that."

Amy scowled. "You know, I'm just praying that the real Doctor is on the other side of the crack, working things out, because he sure as hell isn't going to be getting any help from this side!" Martha watched as she darted out into traffic, weaving through the cars to get back to the TARDIS as fast as possible.

* * *

_The universe is like a safe to which there is a combination. But the combination is locked up in the safe. - Peter de Vries_

* * *

"Non-human. Unknown species." The automated voice that emenated from the full-body scanner into which the Doctor had been ushered upon his arrival at Torchwood's head office was surprisingly pleasant as it announced, "Containment field will activate in three, two..."

"Cancel that." The Doctor turned around in the scanning chamber until he saw Jake Simmonds, still all spiky hair and dimples, standing on the other side of the security station. "Let him pass through," he ordered the guard. "He's the Doctor."

The scanner's technician frowned. "Are you certain, sir? The images we have of the Doctor..."

"Are wrong now," Jake finished. "We'll need to update our memory banks. Let him pass."

The Doctor breathed a sigh of relief when the sliding door opened and he was able to step into the fresh air. "That's more like it," he declared, adjusting his bow tie. "I don't do well in small spaces. I tend to do whatever's necessary to make them bigger." He crossed to Jake. "Are you in charge of them, Jake?" He gestured to indicate the soldiers that flanked Jake on either side.

"I'm head of security, yeah," Jake admitted with pride.

"Then could you tell them to lower their weapons? You've just heard what I do to small spaces. Imagine what I can do to a gun when it's pointed at me."

Jake glanced at his guards. "At ease, mates." Looking back at the Doctor, he shrugged in apology. "You understand it's not every day that an alien walks into our lobby."

"And if this is how Torchwood greets them, it's no wonder they stay away."

"Fair enough," Jake conceded a second later. "It's good to see you again, Doctor. Interesting trick with your face."

The Doctor patted his new cheeks. "Keeps things fresh. Now, did Pete tell you..."

"He called while you were on your way here. I'm to take you straight where you need to go, no detours, no delays. His exact words."

"Good old Pete. As trusting as ever." The Doctor turned around, searching the lobby. "Which way?"

Leaving the guards behind, Jake and the Doctor took an elevator to the fifteenth floor. The doors opened, revealing yet another security checkpoint.

"This is all top-secret. Classified," Jake explained as he flashed his ID card at the guards. "Even I have to have special clearance to be up here. "Every new piece of technology we develop comes out of this department."

As they started towards a set of guarded double doors at the far end of a long hallway, the Doctor glanced back and forth at the placards on the doors they passed. He took note of each of them, but only one made him stop dead in his tracks.

"Jack Harkness, Acquisitions and Requisitons." The Doctor shook his head in disbelief. "It can't be him..."

If he'd been a betting man, he would have laid large amounts of money on the notion that Jack Harkness was an assumed name and that "The Face of Boe" was the only real name Jack had ever given him. So to assume that his parallel universe doppelganger had the same assumed name was improbable, if not out right impossible.

Wasn't it?

Jake, having just noticed that the Doctor had stopped, turned back around. Upon seeing which door had caught the Time Lord's attention, he said, "That's Captain Jack's office."

"Captain Jack," the Doctor repeated in befuddled awe.

"'Course, that's not his real rank," Jake added. "He's a civilian contractor. Rose hired him a few years back. She knows her stuff, she does. There's no one better when it comes to negotiating with alien races than the Captain."

The Doctor reached for the door knob only to find it locked.

"Oh, you won't find him in the office on a Saturday morning." Jake shook his head. "Real family man, Jack is. Got a wife, a husband, kids...the whole lot."

A snort of laughter escaped the Doctor. "Of course." He affectionately patted the wooden frame of the door. "Quite right." Stepping back, he looked at Jake expectantly. "Moving on?"

The hallway ended in heavily fortified double doors. Once again, Jake produced his ID card, only this time, before they were allowed by, they were each handed a pair of blue paper booties to slip on over their shoes.

"Lot of residual energy build-up in there," Jake explained as he covered his combat boots. "These keep us from tracking it all over the building."

"Ah, humans," the Doctor said with great affection. Once they were inside, past the guard, he removed his booties, wadded them up and stuffed them into the pocket of his tweed coat. "You're so adorable sometimes."

True to Jake's word, there was a lot of energy buzzing around the research laboratory. The ceiling lay fifteen feet above their heads, yet every inch of space was fairly buzzing with low, benign levels of particle radiation. The truth was, they could cover themselves from head to toe, but it wouldn't help. The energy, while fortunately not dangerous, was never going to be full contained.

Because it took an awful lot of power to breach dimensional walls.

Jake crossed to a locked vault at the far end of the room, pressed a few buttons on the keypad and waited for the metal door to swing open. From inside, he withdrew what could have passed for a smart phone back in the regular universe.

"Here you are." He offered the device to the Doctor. "Your remote control to the universe."

The Doctor stared at it for a second before reaching for it. "This should be impossible," he noted for the record.

"Hey...you designed it." Jake shrugged. "Sort of."

"Does Rose know about this?"

"No," the younger man admitted after a second.

The Doctor frowned. "He's keeping it a secret?"

"John's just being cautious," Jake came to his friend's defense. "He doesn't even know if it fully works yet. He took the idea of the Dimension Cannon and combined it with the..."

Closing his fist around the dimension-jumper, the Doctor tone grew heavy. "Why? She's happy here, isn't she? Having a baby...having a life!" He took a menacing step forward. "Why did he do this?"

"Because." Jake lifted his shoulder again. "He loves her." He paused. "But if I might say just one wee thing?" The Doctor eyes never left his as he went on, "You two can't keep passing her back and forth, you know? One of these times...you've got to let her decide for herself."

"I'm only using this to bring him back to her. Where he belongs." The Doctor's Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed a sudden lump in his throat. "Not to change anything."

Jake nodded slowly. "I know. And that's the only reason why I'm going to tell you how it works."

* * *

To Be Continued


End file.
